Retirees have plenty of time to go on the vacations they’ve always planned on. Unfortunately, they don’t always have plenty of money to pay for them. As a service to my fellow retirees on fixed incomes, I’ve researched a variety of affordable vacation packages. These are sure to provide memories you will treasure.
California Botanical Delights
Travel to California to go to the San Francisco Flower Show. To get into the spirit of things, be sure to wear some flowers in your hair. Stop by the thrilling Fruit Exposition up on Blueberry Hill in nearby San José (if you know the way…) We recommend the optional side excursion to Napa wine country, where the air is fresher, the kisses are sweeter and the Pinot is always ready for a summer of love.
Buffet Lovers Getaway
For those who love the salt air and yards-long tables of food, but are on low-sodium diets, the popular Buffet Lovers Key West package is the perfect weekend getaway. Spend four days and three nights in Margaritaville. Extras include: guided tour of sponge cake factory reputedly owned by Jimmy Buffet, discount on tattoo by island artist Mexican Cutie, and all the frozen concoctions you can drink. Best of all, you won’t have to worry about any lost shaker of salt. Package includes plenty of low-sodium sea salt for your meals (or wherever you want to use it.)
Glen Campbell Memorial Circuit
The special Glen Campbell Memorial Circuit celebrates the cities he immortalized in his chart-topping songs. Trip kicks off in Phoenix, and by the time you get there, the world’s oldest, star spangled rodeo in nearby Prescott will be in full swing. Then it’s on to Kansas, where you’ll be a guest at an exclusive meet-and-greet with the original Wichita Cable Guy. Final stop: Galveston, where you can hear those sea waves crashing and look out beyond the sea. (Oh, wait. That was Bobby Darin…) You’ll also get a souvenir BeDazzler gem setter so you can come home looking like a Rhinestone Cowboy.
Rock and Roll Nostalgia Tour
Rock around the clock on a unique, nostalgic trip to Memphis. It starts with a visit to Graceland, but the real jewel is a private tour of the Rock and Roll Clothing Museum. You begin in the prom room, where you’ll see Marty Robbins’s white sport coat with a pink carnation—freeze dried (the carnation, not Robbins) and Elvis’s blue suede shoes. Also there—prom dresses in blue velvet and Chantilly lace. Special footwear collection includes white bucks, saddle shoes and bobby sox, and of course, tan shoes with pink shoe laces. For an extra fee, get photographed in the original teeny weenie, yellow polka dot bikini or Dooley’s polka dot vest and big panama with a purple hatband. Museum reproductions of all items are available in the gift shop, and seniors get a 5% discount.
Magical Islands Cruise
This is the perfect autumn vacation for those who enjoy the wind and the mist in their hair. Cruise the Hawaiian Islands on a boat with billowed sails. Ports of call include Kailua-Kona, Waikiki, and finally, on the island of Kauai, Poipu Beach and the mystical land of Honalee. Known for its magical potions and puffs of gentle breezes, Honalee is guaranteed to bring enchanted memories. String and sealing wax come with the package.
All tours include local ground transportation. Taxes are extra. Space is limited, so sign up early to be assured to get the tour of your choice. I’m seriously considering the Napa excursion (surprise, surprise.) On the other hand, I’ve always secretly wanted to get a tattoo. (Well, not on the other hand, actually…)