On Being Bald

November blog delayed  

On Being Bald

At the same time that COVID first broke out, I was diagnosed with lung cancer. I joined a trial with Yale Medical that included chemotherapy. I didn’t lose my hair and the cancer seemed under control (though not gone) for a few years. I’ve been having regular tests to watch the tumor. Several months ago we discovered the cancer had spread outside my lung. I received additional but different chemotherapy and this time I went bald.

 

It was not my first rodeo. I had breast cancer 34 years ago and I lost my hair then. My wedding photos (second marriage) show my dark hair was growing in like Sinead O’Connor’s. My hair has started growing back in again now, but this time it’s age-appropriate white. With several weeks of growth behind me, my look is more Yahya Sinwar than Sinead. I don’t plan to dye it and I’m still wearing snood hats, so it will be awhile before I know what reaction Yahya will get from friends and family.

 

I got a wig when I lost my hair to chemo in my forties. I hated wearing it and except when I was at work, I often wore scarves from my copious collection instead. I’m retired now and I usually just go around bald at home; I wear the hats when I go out. They’re quite stylish. I bought them from Headcovers.com in several colors with and without embellishments. I got a knit cap that I wear in bed at night to keep my head warm.

 

I learned that there are quite a few reasons why it’s good to be bald. You save a lot on shampoo, conditioner and other hair care products—dye, in my case. You also save time washing it and styling it. I used to brush mine 100 strokes every morning even when I kept it short. When I had longer hair, my mother was always nagging me to get it cut or wear it differently. There’s only one option when you’re bald. I also need just one towel when I shower and it takes no time to dry my head.

 

When I had long hair, my toes were forever getting tangled in stray hair that had collected on the bathroom rug. And sometimes in bed at night, it was difficult to tell where my head ended and the cat’s fur began. That’s never a problem when I’m bald.

 

I’m not sure how long I‘ll let my hair grow eventually. I have what is called a widow’s peak and even with that feature, longer hair was always dragging in my eyes. So I might keep it really short. I’ve seen magazine ads of white-haired older women with very short hair. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to pull that off, but I might give it a try.

 

There’s room for an exotic tattoo. That’s probably something only younger folks would be interested in and it will be covered over when the hair grows back. People of all ages will be glad to be done with dandruff flakes. I always loved long, dangly earrings, but they didn’t hang right with my short neck. Once I lost my hair, this was not an issue. Baldness also helps you tell if your ears are off-center, but there’s nothing you can do about that.

 

If you’re stressed about going bald, consider some famous bald figures in history and entertainment.  We had Gandhi, Churchill, Yul Brynner and Kojak. More recently we have Samuel L. Jackson, Dwayne Johnson and Vin Diesel. And Patrick Stewart, Stanley Tucci and James Carville. All the bald women who turn up on searches have shaved heads; I don’t think they should count. I earned my bald head with chemo; shaving it seems like cheating.

 

Being bald has been a different experience this round, but I won’t complain. I spend most of my time at home and we don’t have many visitors. I could probably wear my Little Orphan Annie wig and no one would notice, especially because it’s grayish, not red.  Once my hair grows back, I’m willing to loan out my headgear. If you’d like to add your name to a list of borrowers, let me know. Those on chemo will have priority.

 

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